Saturday, November 20, 2010

Australia's third world postal service and what it means for us now

Greetings,

So for the third time running (not even a lie!) Australia Post's infamous courier service has #$%^*! up again and have lost our passports!!! This changes everything...

Three times, have you not learned by now? Au contraire mon ami, if we had known that the Australian clowns who we entrusted our passports to were going to use AusPost we would have run a mile. Twelve months ago the same thing happened with Karla's passport, we threatened to sue and all sorts of things and somehow it managed to turn up. Unfortunately,this story will not have as happy an ending. So what happened exactly? Allow me...

When the stars align in such a manner you really do need to take heed. From the word go everything and anyone has been telling us not to go to Ethiopia, in all sorts of sometimes subtle and other times dam blunt ways! Before we left Australia everything was in line, we would travel via Nairobi, get our Ethiopian visas there, and then do the much feared road north into Ethiopia. This was correct and being done when we left and has been done this way for centuries. Then about three months ago, I heard from some motorbike dudes that they were no longer issuing visas in Nairobi. As we travelled further north into Africa we confirmed that this was no longer possible. We discovered that there were Ethiopian embassies where we were going and would try there. Further on we find that no east african embassy will issue you with visas unless you are an east african national. Crap!!! What do we do now? Internet forums and other bikers, as well as our dear cycling friend Kevin, had couriered their passports back to their country of residence, had the visas issued in them and then couriered back. Scary concept we thought, imagine if they got lost. Not a word of a lie, we thought that when we sent them!!! We didn't really have a choice, we had planned to visit and were quite looking forward to this country. When I say the stars align, man, they appear to have been drawn with a ruler on this occasion!! We have met people the whole way up who have been through there and we have heard some hellish stories about Ethiopia. They came very close to having me rethink my plans to be honest but at the end of the day that was the plan and we were going to stick with it. Then a few weeks ago we heard that as of a few days before that, one needed a letter of invitation from ones embassy for ones motorbike. Something like, Dear Sir, we cordially invite Yele the Yamaha Tenere into your wonderful land and please look after her while she is there and prevent kids from throwing rocks at her and also prevent her and her riders from being hit with whips as they pass through villages. We thank you sincerely. The embassy of ...!!! What a load of snot!!! Seriously....

As I write this Karla is on the phone to Australian embassies, after fighting with police here for a police report for an entire week. They didn't want to give us a report as technically it didn't go missing in Uganda so why should they say it was lost there. It never actually got here. It made it to London and then it left there... and that is the last anyone has heard. Now one would think that they should be able to track this right? WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!! They just sit and wait until something happens!!! When we talk to Australia Post, "Well Sir, we sent them another remider"..... !@$^$&@^^^!!!! Let me remind you about something you*&^%$%#!!!!!

Am I angry?? I was, kind of over it now. So tomorrow I will make an emergency dash to Nairobi and from there I will try and hold my composure when dealing the local form of Australian beurecracy! Think about that for a second.... As if Australian beurecracy is not bad enough as it is now I have to deal with a Kenyanised version (sic).

Ultimately, there is no more Ethiopia for us on this trip. For a while this upset me slightly, while it might be frustrating and extremely difficult travel, it is apparently also home to some of the world's most amazing landscapes and it also has some of the most bizarre tribes. We had arranged to travel up in a vehicle convoy via Lake Turkana with a South African chap in his Land Cruiser (you need support up there) but that has obviously fallen by the way side. The upshot of all of this is that we have come across a whole lot of people who have absolutely raved about Kenya. So maybe these things happen for a reason? We shall see and we shall of course let you know.

So that means that tomorrow I cross into our last country on our epic journey through Africa on a motorcycle. Scarier still, we fly out of there in a month!! Our 6 month voyage is almost at an end. Sure there is still the UK and India to come but this was the biggie. It has been all that and more but more on that at a later date.

Once the next week or so of screaming at people subsides, we will write up our notes of Rwanda, a country that everyone knows about for all of the wrong reasons. Following that you will probably read our Uganda review when we are in the UK, don't think we will have time in Kenya to get any of that done.

To those in the parts of the world where things work, enjoy those little moments. Right now we are witnessing first hand just why things work on African time and why they most of the time don't really work at all. Sounds a bit harsh maybe, trust me this place is quite unlike any other.

And to Australia Post, when I become the leader of an empire I will ensure that you never ever get to lay your hands on anything that is deemed in the least bit important. You have my word on that.

With love

P and K

xxx

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